Hello! It's been awhile since my last update. This feels very much like the begininng of a Catholic Confession! :)

Well, there's a lot going on - and has kind of put everything in a crazy spin. It's a lot to take in - and it seems very surreal most of the time.

Over the July 4th holiday, Josh and I got engaged. YAY! We planned on a April 21, 2012 wedding at the OBX. We love the OBX, it's where we took our first trip, where we got engaged, and where planned to retire - it seemed perfect to plan a small sunset on the beach wedding surrounded by family and friends. We ended up buying a small camper and renting a lot in a camp site, and our dreams of being 'OBX weekenders' started to come alive.

Our lives got a bit busy, with some family issues and some work issues, and I was still having digestion issues. I was tested for all sorts of things, and struggled with my health for a bit - but a diagnosis of IBS and a change in my eating habits (less beans, less raw food) helped. I'm still trying to get it all settled - between medicine and food logs and digestive patterns and stress - it's coming along and should soon be all figured out. Hopefully.

In October, I had another cancer scare. Precancerous lesions were found and had to be surgically removed at the end of Novermber. The pathologist said there was a healthy margin of cells around the lesions and it was pre-cancerous only, so everything turned out great. I go every few months for the next few years and have checkups to make sure all is still healthy.

The main news is Josh. He had a seizure at the end of October. He has been diagnosed with a rare and potentially fatal thing called an arteriovenous malformation (AVM). It's a tangle of blood vessels in his brain where the arteries and veins are fused together in a tangle with no capillaries in between to slow the blood flow or reduce the pressure. This weakens the wall of the vein over time - and can lead to a rupture. A rupture is usually fatal. He could have a stroke, a bleed, or a rupture at any time and the neurosurgeons refer to this condition as a "time bomb".

When Josh seized we were at OBX. It was an hour to the hospital and once there I was not allowed to be with him in the ER because I was not his wife. I was not allowed to ask questions or help explain what was happening. It was a very rough night and there's a bit more to the story but it's a bit traumatic to post here. Between his health situation and mine, we decided to get married right away - so we could have access to each other during our necessary hopsital visits, stays, appointments and surgeries. We were married the day after Thanksgiving in a very short, small, yet wonderful ceremony. My family was not able to be there, and some of his were not able to be there either. We plan on redoing the ceremony in April for our families. My first time signing my new name was on his hospital release form for his angiogram.

Our lives have been a mix of hurry up and wait - testing, more testing, neurosurgeons, hospitals, insurance forms, and the like. We have tried to remain positive and healthy throughout all of this. We are hoping that all the preliminary tests are done, as we are waiting on the last of the MRI results. We found a neurosurgeon who we are comfortable with - and he is going to be overseeing Josh's treatment. The best course of action is removing the AVM - which means brain surgery and a long recovery.

However, where the AVM is located in the left frontal lobe, is very close to the parts where speech and motor function is controlled. Any form of treatment, surgery, rupture, bleed, or stroke runs a very high risk of Josh being permanently paralyzed and speechless. The dr is doing everything he can to reduce the risk as much as possible and the best option it seems at this time is to surgically remove it. There are two other options, but they run the risk of causing a stroke or a bleed and are not as certain to cure the situation. Only total removal of the AVM will remove the risk of stroke, bleed, and rupture.

Needless to say, this has been and will be our main focus for however long it takes. While we are trying to maintain our health in other aspects, all 'extra curricular' reading, meetings, and gatherings are out. Josh is not allowed to do anything strenuous, or raise his heartbeat or blood pressure. So we have been staying close to home and reducing outside stressors as much as possible.

We remain positive as we have been very lucky so far. Most AVMs present themselves either with a stroke or a bleed - which are mostly fatal - the first time. Josh only had a grand mal seizure. I say only, it was a horrible night, but it was the least of the things that could have been. he has not had a bleed or rupture, we have been able to search out and pick our own surgeon instead of working with an ER surgeon. We have had all the tests done before hand to ensure Josh will still be Josh when he is healed of this. In an emergency situation, people are not so lucky. We have been very blessed and are optimistic that we are in good hands at Duke. They rank #8 in the nation in dealing with AVM removals - so we are right where we need to be.

We would appreciate any prayers, well wishes, thoughts, white light, what-have-you that you are willing to send our way.

Thank you all - and hopefully soon I will be able to update that we are on the other side of this, in recovery, the AVM successfully removed and onto the path of healthy living.

Wow, that's an incredible story. My wishes our for a speedy recovery and to your future health.